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What’s Up With the Male DNA? - Male Language Decoded

Sometimes I just feel like being stupid and read dick jokes. Well.. today is the day…

  1. I am hungry = I am hungry
  2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
  3. I am tired = I am tired
  4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
  5. I love you = Let’s have sex now
  6. I am bored = Can we have sex now?
  7. May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you
  8. Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you
  9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you
  10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you
  11. I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit = I’m gay
  12. “Uh huh,” “Sure, honey,” or “Yes, dear.” Really means:
    Absolutely nothing. It’s a conditioned response.
  13. Take a break, honey, you’re working too hard =
    I can’t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner
  14. That’s interesting, dear = Are you still talking?
  15. “Hmm? What? Yeah…” Really means:
    “You want me to stay awake after sex?!”
  16. “Oh, don’t fuss. I just cut myself, it’s no big deal.” Really means:
    “I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit
    I’m hurt.”
  17. “I do help around the house.” Really means:
    “I’d throw a dirty towel near the laundry basket and be done with it. “
  18. Hey, I’ve got my reasons for what I’m doing = And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.
  19. What did I do this time? = What did you catch me at?
  20. You look terrific. = Please don’t try on one more outfit. I’m starving.

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