Are The Guys Too Intimidated To Date Us?
Ok, we’ve heard this enough times from the girls who just came out of the broken relationships:
“I am smarter, faster, taller, richer and prettier. So he must feel too intimidated to be with me. “
Yep, this is the best excuse we can come up with. Think about this, we are successful, we are beautiful, we make great money, we are fun and furious females (using Cosmo’s lingo). So what could possibility be the reason why the guys don’t want to be with us? They must be intimidated, we believe.
I was at Comedy Works the other night enjoying Greg Behrendt performing on the stage. If anyone is not familiar with this name, he is the author of a quite popular book He’s just not that into you. The guy had some insights of relationship topics in general so I picked up a copy after the show.
Basically, Greg’s theory is that even if a guy doesn’t think he can match up, he will still move mountains to chase the girl he likes. So when a man breaks up with a woman, all it means is that he is just not that into her, regardless how much smarter, faster, richer and prettier she is. No other excuses ladies!
Although Greg does have a good point, I am not so sure if I totally agree with him. Men find their values when they can provide for their women. If a man feels that he has nothing to offer to her, he is probably going to feel a lot of pressure and eventually withdraw regardless how much he adores his capable woman.
So, will a man chase after a woman who is 10 times more capable than him? I believe he will. But will a man stay with this woman if he finds that he has no value in this relationship? I don’t think so.
My theory (maybe I am in my own dreamland) is that a man will leave the woman for other reasons even though he is still very much into her. What boils down is whether it is a balanced relationship where both parties are able to find satisfactions. For man, I guess the most important thing is to know that he is needed.
But on the other hand, if the relationship is still at its baby stage ranged from a few hours to a few months, I guess Greg is right about that “He is just not that into you” theory.
Did any guy ever initiate a breakup while he was still very much into the girl? I’d be curious to see what you think…
mountaincurmudgeon said,
November 15, 2005 @ 8:41 am
In answer to your last question…yes. I once broke up with an intelligent, beautiful, successful, fabulous girl I was totally in love with because she accidentally stepped on my rope.
Hey, rules are rules.
Sorry I missed you this weekend. I realized on Saturday afternoon that I was supposed to come down there about 24 hours earlier. Long week, and longer story. We’ll climb again soon.
Yuna said,
November 15, 2005 @ 9:16 am
Oh my gosh.. now I am sooooo scared to climb with ya … what if i step on your rope? I’d be on mountaincurmudgeon’s black communist list forever ever and ever…That’s a severe consequence…
No worries… it’s getting a bit cold but I still try to get out and climb at least once every other weekend… If you decide to come to Denver and visit your pals, I’d get some climbers together… Enjoy the snow! Climb on!
little puppy said,
November 15, 2005 @ 12:10 pm
depends on how you identify ” need “. Good look, rich, successful…. doesn’t mean you don’t NEED anybody otherwise all those “giants” would be single. Phisical apperance, social status…. these are not the main reasons that intimidate a guy. You treat him like a piece of shit or something precious beyond all what you have already had, this makes difference. If you can stay as happy without him, I don’t see the reason why you still want to keep him. He would feel the same way most of the time before you realize it.
Accidentally In Love said,
August 25, 2006 @ 2:59 am
Dave…
Interesting topic… I’m working in this industry myself and I don’t agree about this in 100%, but I added your page to my bookmarks and hope to see more interesting articles in the future…
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December 7, 2006 @ 12:43 am
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December 7, 2006 @ 10:05 pm
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September 28, 2007 @ 6:41 am
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